Did you have sex before marriage? (with a poll)

Oh, you're not the only one! I'm 46, reasonably attractive, not a virgin and no one has asked me either. Ah well, that's what friends with benefits are for..............

L Kat:

I'm 33

Oh sure... rub it in... I got bald spots older than u...hehe.

I've got cookware.

I've got bald spots in my shoes ...

Damn!

I've got bald spots in my cookware ... (doesn't work as well, does it?)

Gawwwd are we old!!!

You saw my comment before I changed it....Too funny!!

Yep, and I responded to it - so I couldn't simply 'opt out' of leaving a message when I saw that it had changed after I first hit the "Post Comment" button.

Your comment wouldn't have looked right. We must look right at all costs. Argyle socks and Sports jackets with patches on the elbows just look right, right?

How'd you do that?

Magic. I have magical powers.

I see you have them too...........[laughing]

Absolutely!! And ... you'll be glad to hear that the fall fashions have come out (such as they are here in the hinterland) and it seems like argyle sweaters ("V"-neck and vests) are back 'in'! Redemption!!

What goes around, comes around. But I'm telling you right now, I'm not wearing these.

Ah - saddle oxfords, huh? No - I can understand that. How about these? I generally wear these.

When I rode I wore these........and now I wear these. But when I rode, I wore this and since I don't ride anymore, I wear this.

That's just sick!

I'm certainly glad I'm not riding anything like that!

What? The first pair of boots rls8r linked or the argyle socks and sports jacket with the patches on the elbows?

It was the splits at the hiney that caught my eye...

WUDE!!! I knew if I showed that ass you'd cum.

I showed that ass you'd cum.

dkaz You know me too well my darling.

So that's what they mean by banging.

When I was in Catholic School, (Waaay back in the day). They didn't talk about it at ALL! In fact, boys and girls used different classrooms after 4th grade! ;-)

The nun was lecturing her class on premarital sex. She asked "Is an hour of pleasure worth an eternity of damnation?"

A girl in the back of the class raised her hand and asked "How do you make it last an hour?"

5.2 Tina: Good one! LOL

Tina:

The nun was lecturing

knew nothing about sex, cuz she was *supposedly* celebate...hehe (But we all know that the nunnery's is where they *got it on*...lol)

Just like a priest teaching courses on marriage? That one always stumped me.

"Is an hour of pleasure worth an eternity of damnation?"

A girl in the back of the class raised her hand and asked "How do you make it last an hour?"

Let's put a different view on this; Is 20 min (lets be reasonable) of physical relief, worth the surrender of your freedom to the women, lol. Obviously, that statement was directed towards dudes. More power to the woman I guess.

They tend to stress the no sex before marriage a bite to much as if, that is the act that will do it. I mean if that is the worst you did and you still loved the person, then I still consider yourself a good person. I personally just cannot have meaningless sex, I do not know why, I just can not and I hope people respect that.

Venator:

Is 20 min

Let's be *realistic*... 20 seconds...hehe and the response would be Ya sure, u betcha!!!

Let's be *realistic*... 20 seconds...

You cuddle too?? lol

You cuddle too?? lol

Would like to... haven't had the opportunity in ages... forgot how. Need instructions.

Would like to... haven't had the opportunity in ages... forgot how. Need instructions.

Here!! lol

Mary J:

Thanx... Now to find a victim... I mean cuddle partner...

Now to find a victim

lmao

They would be lucky to have such a fun and nice person to cuddle with. :) And don't you forget that. :)

Awwww, darn

Just like a priest teaching courses on marriage? That one always stumped me.

Yeah, like he knew anythin' about bein' married to the wicked witch of the west... and if so, why didn't he give any *WARNINGS*... The psychotic glazed over eyes should have been a warnin'... But I was lookin' *ELSEWHERE* (o)(o) and ( * ) and {()}... Now, I look women in the eyes *FIRST* thing...Then if they pass that test, then *ELSEWHERE* I go...lol

I forgot to add that I didn't care if he was a Poll or not. LOL

{{{{{{River}}}}}}

It's not much, but I hope it helps......sending good thoughts your way.....

Thank you for good vibes, kj. :)

Deep sadness expressed, River. The fact that you survived with humor and intelligence intact says a lot about who you are in essence - that core of self that can be irrevocably isolated or lost but never significantly altered.

Thank you, AKCS.

Intelligence played a huge part in survival. Having a solid sense of self was a key component to recovery. There were many who "tried to help", but in truth, the damage was so very extensive that I was the only one who could geniunely save myself in the long run. In so many ways, I am one of society's greatest losers, and at the same time, I am a winner beyond the wildest imaginations of most. Coming to terms with that, and allowing myself to appreciate my own worth as an individual is simply priceless.

I have, through the years, uncovered a wry humor with respect to my legacy, and although it is often stained with cynicism or frequently tainted with a razored sarcasm, it does make life easier to live. That has been perhaps my greatest challenge...discovering and respecting reasons to live.

When I first came across Uncle Milty's article here, I passed it by. I didn't want to be a downer on his fu, and this is not something that I have ever publicly discussed, in depth. It showed up again on my conversation tracker, and again, I passed it by. I got to thinking, though, about just how damning society is to people who are not like them, about just many people, especially women, have had their hopes, dreams, and even their very lives sacrificed for the sake of sheer ignorance.

When I consider a person, I do not care where they have been, or who has spent time in their bed, or which hand they use to wipe their nasty butts with. I care about how they treat life. I care about whether or not they have respect for their environment. I care about their actions toward the elderly and the children, as well as one another. I care about whether or not they respect themselves. There's just no time in my life for all that other foolishness.

I speak out now, because I feel it's really important that someone should. I know that I am not alone, and the girls who have been victimized deserve to be considered.

The fact that you face your horrors and acknowledge the damage done to you openly with dignity and grace could very well be the gentle nudge someone else out here in the world needs to start letting go of the pain of the past and start working on the pain in the present. Thanks for trusting us with a glimpse into your personal darkness and for sharing even a part of your journey.

Wow, River, when I first read this poll, I was think about voluntary sex, but you're post made me rethink that because I lost my virginity before I even knew what it was.(age 10) And to an uncle who should have been protecting me as well. Maybe this poll is skewered because a lot of us didn't have a choice in premarital sex. It was forced on us by others.

I can imagine that it is a little tainted, windsinger, but that's likely to be with everyone, to some extent.

Am very, very sorry that your uncle did not respect you first as a child, then as a family member... If you were anything like me, you learned early that what you felt like doing wasn't going to be nearly so important as what the men around you felt like doing. Those of us who have lived through it are all too aware that on those kinds of days, it's so much easier on everyone if you just do it, get it done, and get left alone. That tends to twist the perceptions, however. We can't fault every instance with "rape", but we are still the ones trying to scrub away the memories, hidden in a locked bathroom....some of us still, 30 years later, reliving the instances in nightmares when it should be sweet dreams filling our thoughts. The damage never really heals. We simply learn to cope with it.

I get very angry when I see people make a rabid argument over sexuality. Those are not the people who have lived these experiences. They have set very pretty in a sugarplum world, secured with a daddy, or an uncle, or a brother, or some form of protection to help them keep themselves from the types of exposures we have known.

In reality, the vast majority of women throughout the world do not ever get the opportunity to appreciate such a life. To continue to degrade, mock, ridicule, and exile them on the premise of "morality" is not acceptable to me.

Amen, River. I'm 49 and I still found myself shaking when I typed my post. I've spent years "getting over this" but it still bothers me. But I don't intend to let it "ruin" my life because if I do then he wins and that's not right. WE ARE WORTHY!!! AND IT IS NOT MY FAULT YOU DIRTY BASTARD! There! Take that!

"Don't piss on the third rail" is a common sense rule. "Don't have sex before marriage" is a religious edict.

Don't you know that every time someone has premarital sex, an angel dies?

I'm sorry that some people are so morally weak they can't observe the simplest of disciplines.

About 76% of black babies are now born out of wedlock. One sure way to remain in poverty is to be a single mother. You believe that's a good thing? Of course you do. Without people dependent on government, what use would there be for democrats?

No sex before marriage, no unwanted babies, no murdered unborn babies, no hurt feelings, no exploited women, no condemning people to a life of poverty.

Religion has nothing to do with it. But hey, liberalism is all about bad behavior.

And generalizations are all about oversimplification.

And did I mention venereal diseases, which have devastated women? But then, I don't expect liberal women to understand.

The Spirit

I used to take your rants seriously but have since concluded that you're actually a funny fellow, you just frame your comedic routines in black-or-white terms!

But then, I don't expect liberal women to understand.

Thank goodness.

Go right ahead and keep pouring on the unnecessary and arbitrary judgment, Spirit. Ultimately your shame really doesn't have anything to do with sex. It only has to do with your mind.

Free your mind. And you don't even have to have sex to do it.

Don't piss on the third rail is a common sense rule.

LMAO

"Don't piss on the third rail" is a common sense rule.

Don't stand in *front* of the train is also a common sense rule... Some people haven't caught on to that one:-(

Was also raised as good little catholic girl. My four sisters and I all had sex before marriage. Only one of us is actually still a practicing catholic. In fact one of my younger sisters, who is divorced, is living in sin as we speak so my mother says.

Sex is good for you, relieves the stress.

Sex is good for you, relieves the stress.

I agree. Helps me sleep better too.

Not to mention it's good old dirty fun!

Yep, dirty fun is way better than clean fun unless there's slippery soapy suds involved! See y'all, gotta go take a shower now!

It keeps the complexion rosy also. And good for back pain.

Mary - I think you may be right but God is a just God and the Bible is very clear to His response to sin. The good news is the Grace through Jesus Christ. We are forgiven. Those that do not subscribe to a Christian belief, need not respond. I know what you think.

Rational Poster....Your screen name suits you. :) I agree. :)

lol My mom NEVER talked to me about sex. And the closest talk I had with my father about sex was that he told me not to hug the boys because they were just trying to feel my chest against theirs. lol

Aha! So he's the one.

It's sad that they felt they had to lie to you to make a point. There's no value in that.

LOL - My mom is in her 70s, and NOW she starts talking about it:)

Edit: Jane - I try to think that at least they made the effort, which I think was hard for them at the time:)

Aha! So he's the one.

lmao I hugged them anyway!! lol

etva:

When I was 17, my parents called my brother and me to a family meeting to tell us about sex.

Wow... That is waaaay too late for a discussion about sex. I was raised catholic too, and didn't believe a word of it... Still don't...lol

LOL - My mom is in her 70s, and NOW she starts talking about it:)

I remember my grandmother (in her 70s) telling me in my mid-twenties (in a Southern Mississippi drawl), "now you just be sure to find someone who can cook, cause anyone can go to bed"!

Fortunately, I didn't have to settle. And, the first woman I had sex with shortly after that wonderful wisdom is now my wife of 25 years.

Reminds me of the old Pennsylvania Dutch saying: "Kissin' don't last, cookin' do"!

Since I'd never invite the f in the first place, I have no problem with the concept <evil grin>

3 or 4 a week? You were a mimbo? lol ((((Pint))))

I was a really good little boy Mary lmao

(((Mary J)))

You were a mimbo?

A mimbo............LOL!!!

Why Pint??? You....You.....More YOU!!!!

why dkaz

you can have some too..

(((dkaz)))

No offense Pint, but JJ hugs better. He does one of these numbers...

((((((((((Pint))))))))))

lmao .. that really is a better hug :)

you have no idea Mary

lmao

You're right. I don't. :( lmao

i don't ride that part of the fence so i wouldn't be able to help you, i do understand your predicament.. Home schooling can be tough

Wow mike...thanks for bringing to my attention how the last part of that statement sounded!! I don't ride that side of the fence either...I was actually saying or more aptly...trying to state that I was looking for a FWB. Not asking if you would be!! Thanks for catching that one man! I feel like a real idiot now!

LOL i knew what you meant but me being me i couldn't let it go!! sorry did not mean to embarrass you..